Can you be counted on for clean communication? What does that mean? It means, instead of complaining, that you make a request to people about what’s necessary. It means, when you see something in breakdown, that you point it out and bring a solution to what it could be. It means that if your nose goes sideways because you’re not getting along with somebody, that you go immediately to them and talk to them about what’s going on and say, “Hey, there’s something in breakdown here. I’m calling to have a cleanup conversation to see how we can get back on the rails, in terms of our relationship being connected, because right now I’m a little bit angry about what’s going on.” It means you’re taking responsibility to keep the communication clean, advancing it in powerful ways and making sure that you don’t become a part of the problem, but that you’re always, instead, a part of the solution.
The magical system behind all of that is buried in a powerful rule called “the request.” In other words, there are many people who can point out what’s wrong, but that doesn’t move anything along. It’s not advancing language. A request that asks for a specific behavior, alternatively, is a powerful thing that gets you what you want most of the time. Or it gets you into the negotiation, where you can understand the other side of the story.
Please stand up to be the kind of person that can be counted on for clean communication, so that nobody goes sideways in conversations with you, and so that that there is no worry about passive-aggressive behavior and all those kinds of things that can sneak in during challenging times, where sometimes the highest and best self doesn’t show up. Choose to be the person of character that makes sure that you stay in the request.