Thank God It's Monday®! Blog

So, here’s the thing—someone broke our communication.

Okay, I know, people don’t exactly talk like that, but every year, when we look at all the different culture surveys we’ve been doing for decades, we consistently find the same thing: the number one thing that’s broken in organizations is communication.

Now, here’s what’s interesting about communication: when someone says, “Our communication is broken,” what do they actually mean? Does it mean the info from the top isn’t getting through to the rest of the organization? Does it mean people don’t understand how their work connects to the bigger strategic goals? Does it mean we’re bad at handling conflict? Or maybe it’s that people don’t know about new initiatives because the updates aren’t getting passed along?

It could also mean something more subtle—like, people feel tense, walking around on eggshells, not knowing what’s okay to say, or even if they can have a little fun at work. Sometimes, we all get so caught up in the seriousness of things that we forget: work can be fun when we make it fun. And honestly, it’s up to each of us to bring that energy.

The point is, we’re all responsible for communication—and I want to give you one tip to kick things off: Don’t be a lazy communicator.

What’s a lazy communicator? It’s when you give half-statements that leave people guessing. Like, if someone has to ask you follow-up questions just to figure out how to execute on what you just said, that’s lazy communication.

We all do it—humans, especially in America, are pretty lazy communicators by nature. But you don’t have to be. Instead, try thinking outcome-first when you speak. Ask yourself, What do I need them to understand in order to take action? Did I say everything I needed to say, and did I say it in a clear, concise way?

Have you been thoughtful about how you constructed your message? Or did you just let the first thought that popped into your head spill out? (Guilty of that myself, by the way—confession time!)

It’s all about being intentional with your words so that when you communicate, you get straight to the point. No one should have to ask questions because you’ve already anticipated what they might be, and you’ve said it clearly.

Your communication doesn’t have to be broken if you’re willing to fix it.

If you’re aiming to become a boss someday, let me tell you how it really works.

One day, someone gives you a promotion. People start calling you “boss,” and suddenly—poof!—you’re enlightened, right? You magically know everything. You never make mistakes. You’re a pro at handling people.

Yeah…not on this planet.

The reality is, managers are just people—humans—trying to figure it all out, just like everyone else. So why do we keep beating them up for not acting like some mythical “perfect boss”?

Here’s the truth: we have to learn how to manage our bosses. Because, let’s face it, sometimes they’re going to do things that aren’t exactly appropriate. Sometimes they’ll say things that could’ve been handled better. Other times, they won’t give us the guidance we need, or they won’t be fully on board with what it takes to improve the organization.

So, what do you do? Quit?

Well, let me tell you something: if you quit, odds are, you’ll have the same issues with your next boss. Everywhere you go, there you are. If you haven’t learned to manage your boss, the cycle just repeats.

Here’s the thing about bosses—you’ve got to learn to walk in and ask for what you need.

Let me share a story. Years ago, I hired this incredible woman, Annie Kellaway, as the marketing manager at our bank. She was tiny, feisty, brilliant, and just a great person.

One day, I saw her walking across the lobby, heading straight for the owner of the holding company’s office. She’d only been with us for three weeks. I remember thinking, Who told her she could do that? I hope she doesn’t get in trouble.

Five minutes later, she walked back to her office like it was no big deal. By the end of the day, curiosity got the best of me. When she stopped by my office (as she often did), I asked, “What were you talking to Duane about?”

She smiled and said, “Oh, I told him we’re teaching the tellers to enthusiastically greet people and show they care. But because he’s an introvert, he usually just walks straight to his desk every day without saying hello to anyone. I asked him if he could stop by the teller station twice a week—just for about 30 seconds—to say hi, get to know people, maybe ask about their kids. You know, connect a little.”

I was stunned. “What did Duane say?” I asked.

She replied, “He said he’d be delighted.”

And that’s when I learned an important lesson.

I don’t have to be a victim when a manager isn’t doing what they should. I can simply ask for what I need.

That’s part of adulting, isn’t it? Learning how to ask for what we need instead of doing that unattractive thing adults sometimes do—complaining when we don’t get what we want.

Your manager didn’t have a magical poof moment where they suddenly became perfect. They’re just doing the best they can, and sometimes, they need you to help guide them.

Here’s the kicker: if you’re good at guiding, people will notice. It’ll serve you well in the long run, but more importantly, you’ll have a much more joyful life.

So, go for it. Ask for what you need. Decide to make your boss the best boss you’ve ever had—because you made it happen.

One thing you can always count on—whether you’ve been in the workplace for one year or twenty—is this: there will always be people who, when things go wrong, resort to whining. But let’s be real—whining doesn’t fix anything. It never has, and it never will. The only thing that moves the needle is using forward-focused language.

Now, let’s have an honest moment. We’ve all done it. Yep, all of us. So, let’s just confess right now and get that out of the way.

When we complain or whine, what we’re really saying is, “I’m a victim. I can’t do anything about this. Somebody else should swoop in and save the day.” It’s like we’re waiting for some magical prince to show up, kiss us awake, and solve all our problems.

Spoiler alert: That only happens in Disney movies. In real life, there’s no Prince Charming coming to rescue us. It’s up to us.

When things go wrong at work—and let’s be honest, they do all the time because, well, it’s work—we have a choice. We can either play the victim and whine, or we can take a deep breath, roll up our sleeves, and think, “This is why they hired me—to figure this out. Let me show them how capable I am.”

And if that doesn’t come naturally to you? Guess what? It doesn’t come naturally to anyone. It’s a learned skill. It’s part of adulting. And adulting is hard. We all have those moments when we slip into that whiny, “poor me” mindset.

But here’s the key: Catch yourself when it happens. Say to yourself, “Hold on. Am I whining right now? This isn’t who I want to be.” Then snap out of it. Give yourself a quick pep talk, ditch the whining, and focus on making something great happen.

Decide that you’re working in a no-whining zone—and that it starts with you.